One of the worst experiences you could ever endure as a parent is to find out there is something wrong with your child.
My husband and I had to face the hard truth when we found out our son was on the autism spectrum. The biggest difficulty with this type of diagnosis is the lack of assistance and guidance parents receive. We were faced with an unknown and were forced to figure this one out for ourselves. From this experience, I want to share that this is not a death sentence, and early intervention is key. If anyone suspects they may be in a similar situation, I hope they can take something from this that will help.
The following is a list of signs and symptoms we noted as parents that triggered to us that something was wrong:
Milestones: This was probably at the earliest point in recognizing the problem. At 1 year, babies should be pointing and clapping. Our son did neither. He did not mimick much either. If we stuck our tongue out, he did not copy. He also was very late to sit up by himself, or crawl in a normal fashion. His crawling began as an army crawl dragging his belly on the floor and led by one arm as if the other carried a rifle.
Speech: I'll never forget the day my husband exclaimed in frustration "Why can't I have a conversation with my son? He's two years old!" Jayson was 26 months old before he even said "Mommy," and it still was only said as a word, not as if he was calling or speaking to me. Once his speech finally began to develop, he suffered from echolalia. Echolalia is repeated speech. For example, we would say "Hi, Jayson!" And in return, Jayson would say "Hi, Jayson" instead of "Hi, Mommy." Once we got past the echolalia, we had to tackle the Wh-questions. These are difficult with children on the spectrum since they have an easier time with the concrete, black and white, yes/no questions vs. the more abstract Wh-questions.
Intense musical and mathematical skills and letter recognition: How could something so interesting and amazing be a sign for something wrong? I still will never categorize these as downfalls. They are gifts that are commonly seen with children on the spectrum. For example, our son could point out A# on a xylophone, read basic words, and recognize all the letters of the alphabet (and differentiate between upper and lower case) all at the age of 2. By kindergarten, he was already able to do multiplication.
Sensory issues: There are many characteristics associated with sensory issues. Plenty of food aversions, gagging, and vomiting. Discomfort with coats zipped up all the way. Opposition to touching certain textures. Comfort found in "ticking." Flapping of the hands. Intolerance to loud noises resolved by putting fingers in ears. Clumsiness and unawareness of one's surroundings - i.e. the inability to walk without falling, climb a ladder, hold a spoon appropriately, etc.
Fine motor skills: Jayson can't seem to hold onto anything! We found a weakness in his fine motor skills that affected many areas such as writing, grasping, etc.
The following is a list of services that can help:
Speech Therapy: If insurance will cover it, find a reputable speech therapist office that will provide references. If insurance does not cover it, you might as well go private and have someone come to the home. We got a list from the Macomb County school district and interviewed several therapists. It's hard to say how much speech therapy helped our son and how much of it was due to typical development and time. But, I did see many critical lessons being taught that did not seem to be sticking at the time so much as maybe were formulating to emerge down the road when he became ready and able to use the skills. I would not go back and do anything differently. Plus, it was our therapist who first suggested a gluten free diet (see below).
Occupational Therapy: OT was probably one of the most remarkable therapies with the most notable improvements. It gave Jayson the ability to be aware of his surroundings which resolved MANY issues, and it inadvertently brought out more speech. It's almost as if there was a personal struggle going on inside his body that interefered with his ability to speak, and once he got comfort from the OT progress, it opened up some doors in his brain allowing him to communicate. OT also improved Jayson's gag reflex and helped him with managing the sensation of certain textures. It focused greatly on sensory integration and motor skills.
Diet: Do your research or speak with a nutritionist. Eliminate gluten and casein (dairy) from the diet. These somehow do not digest well in a child on the spectrum, and instead filter endlessly in their system and ultimately end up in their brain and gut, causing many focus and learning issues. We saw a tremendous change once we switched to this diet. And, each day we are reassured this diet works. If we "cheat" and let Jayson have a piece of real pizza, it is obvious moments later that this does a number on his system. I have experimented and cooked hundreds of dishes to find those that are closest to the real thing. I will forewarn that this is SO incredibly difficult, and it is tempting to revert back to what is easiest. But making the sacrifice to cook separate meals, spend the extra money, effort and time pays off in ways inexchangeable. It's certainly justified and necessary in the development.
That all said, I am not claiming to be an expert, but merely a mom who's been through it. I would happily discuss my experience with anyone who is looking for help. I can be contacted at Lisa@OaklandCountyMoms.com.
--Lisa LaGrou blogs at http://www.oaklandcountymoms.com.
You can follow her on Twitter, http://www.twitter.com/OaklandCtyMoms
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